Youbetcha.

Oh,whatajoyIdidn’twakeupdead.Whattalesofnothingwillunfold?Nowhereisn’tanywhereIwanttolive.Nowhereisanaddressthat’sveryhardtogive.Iwanttolivetoseewhatthisplacelookslikeafterit’sobliterated.It’sthissittingheredoingnothing!Thesight’sabittoomuchforme!HowaboutthinkingpeopleshouldacceptmeforwhoIamWithoutmyhavingtochange?Right!Theyshouldacceptyouforyouare:Acomplexandinterestingyoungladyworthknowing,InsteadofseeingyourglassesandjumpingtosomemoronicconclusionBasedonridiculousstereotypesandtheirownignorance.Ialwaysknewthisdaywouldcomeandwonderedhowitwouldbe.And,nowthatishas,Ifeelstrangely…serene.Supposeyouwerewellknownfornotcaringwhatotherpeoplethinkofyou,AndthensuddenlyyoudidsomethingThatshowedmaybeyoudocarealittleaboutwhatotherpeoplethinkofyou.Wouldthatinvalidateeverythingyou’ddoneandsaiduptillthenAndmakeyouahypocrite?Sothatshecangetundermyskin.I’mahypocriteandphony.That’swhat’sthematter.Whotoldyouyouhadtobeamartyrtoprinciple?Tohavestandardstoohightoliveupto.Likewe’renotthatdifferent,justhuman,orwhatever.Wearejusthumanorwhatever.Isawthebestmindsofmygenerationdestroyedbymadness.They’rehomeless,they’renottasteless.Iwouldn’tgiveherthesatisfactionofhelpingme.Iwouldn’tletherknowshewashelpingme.NativitiesmeanChristmas,andChristmasmeansrevenue.Don’thavetobeawisemantofigurethatout.Couldtheymaketheholidaysanymorevulgar?Themoredebasedtheybecome,thelessreasontocelebratethem.SometimesIwonderifyou’retoocynical,evenforme.Theblood’sthereasonthey’resostill.Getreadytoworklikeyou’veneverworkedbefore!Myownfleshandblood.Couldn’tjustletmeenjoythemoment,couldyou?I’vecome,I’veseen,let’sgo.Beingyoung,carefree,havingyourwholelifeaheadofyouanddancingthenightawaytocelebrate.Nowlet’sslowthingdownsowecanheatthingsup,ifyougetmydrift.We’reyoung,butwise;edgy,butfullofheart.AsfarasIcanmakeout,edgyoccurswhenmiddlebrow,middle-agedProfiteersarelookingtosucktheenergy,nottomentionthespendingmoney,Outofthe“youthculture”.SotheycomeupwiththisfakeconceptofseemingtobedangerousWheneverymovetheymakeIstheresultofmarketresearchandacorporatemasterplan.I’mnotbeingnegative,I’mbeingedgy.Imadeyou,andIcanunmakeyou!Okay.WhatamIdoinghere?HowamIgoingtogetthroughthis?DearGod,helpme.SometimesIfeellikethewholeadultworldisagainstyouthculture.Excepttheadultsmakinganice,fatlivingoffofit.WhatdoyoumeanpushingyourselfassomekindofrolemodelWhenallyoucareaboutishowyoulookandwhatcelebritiesyouknow?Aren’tteenagegirlsscrewedupenoughWithoutyoufoistingyourshallowvaluesonthemAndmakingtheirlousyself-imagesevenworse?Whydon’tyougetintouchwiththe30-somethingwithout?Yourreadersaren’tgoingtobeteenagersforever,unlikeyou.Arealrolemodelwouldbeteachingthemstufftheycanuse.That’scheckandmate.Yes.Fromjusttherightangle,Ireallycanseethroughyourhead.Soyourheadwouldserveassortofanaccentpiece.Butyou’vegotfarmoretoofferthanyourneck.Youmademelosemyplace.Infact,IdoubtIcanevertoptoday’sperformance.SoIthinkI’lltakeearlyretirement,startingtomorrow.You’vealreadyseenmeinenoughhumiliatingsituations.Sowhatwouldonemorehurt?Miserylovescompany.Itwentsurprisinglywell.ShouldIcomedownandvisit?Offersomemoralsupport?They’ve,like,hijackedmybrain.Mothtoaflame.Youbetcha.